Hurricane Harbor

A writer and a tropical muse. A funky Lubavitcher who enjoys watching the weather, hurricanes, listening to music while enjoying life with a sense of humor and trying to make sense of it all!

Friday, November 23, 2007

In Memory of Harvey

When someone dies that you love, you don't want to talk about it or hear how special he was or have people give you all their stories, you just want to be alone to process it and remember. And, yet.. everyone wants to comfort you or share.

Judaism has Shiva. I've been through Shiva, I'm hoping my mother lives to be 120 and outlives me because I don't want to do that again. Or, maybe next time I'll just self-medicate myself through it.

I think I like the Irish Wake thing, never been there but gives you a chance to get rip roaring drunk and not feel and know you have friends around you I guess.

I mean who really processes death in those first few moments of hearing someone finally succumbed to cancer huh? I mean, some people cry, scream.. I guess that's works for them. I guess I can write more than cry or moan. Me? I go back in the house, grab my heels and go sit in a car with my best friend and bitch about life. Okay, not really bitch but we needed to talk. We were all friends. Many lifetimes too, I'm terrified of dying because I am terrified what new lifetime he will haunt. Probably be my father or mother.. tell me to "uncross your legs" or be some bratty child on a sugar high.

A best friend of mine died yesterday. He was a ... how shall I put this.. a Bone Doctor. A Chiropractor. I was his friend, his patient and his secretary. I ran his office, nice office up high looking out over Miami and the Bay. Well, no Jay's office was looking out over the Bay, Harvey's was hidden in the back like most everything in his life, top right drawer, all his secrets. But Norm knew that because he found Norm going through his things. Hope Norm liked what he saw. I'm digressing. Are bookmarks and Mint Magic tea all that important to someone who needs to know?

What do you need to know?

You need to know life is about LIVING. God didn't put us on this earth to suffer or he would not have made it as beautiful as it is.. He wouldn't have bothered with snow and how the moonlight looks on it in the evening when a full moon is shining down on it with all that shadow and the light and darkness and glitter you see when the moonlight shines on the snow. He wouldn't have made palm trees framing a tropical aquamarine bay that turns every shade from turquoise to the pea green color right before a storm. God put COLOR into this world. God put beauty. God put LOVE into it. All we have to do is to choose to live, choose to love and choose to laugh and roll with the punches.

Yes, there is evil. Yes, there are heroes. And, yes there are people in between who live their life with a purpose and a passion or no purpose but to get through the day and end it in the arms of someone they love.

I've given up on purpose. I want love. Plain and simple. Love, laughter and a big bottle of tequila to go with dinner tonight. Don't worry..the order is in.

Harvey took care of me always, even when he was pissing me off or pissed off with me he took care of me. He took care of my kids, my ex-husband, my best friends..

He was there last week taking care of my daughter, both of them ... I think he loved my daughters more than me lol giggling but well, he just always was so amused by them. So am I.

Stories don't tell everything, neither do movies or plays. They only tell so much.

Before Harvey became religious and a Miami Beach guy... he was from the Bronx and studied acting, then he studied karate, then computers.. I may be wrong on that order, I don't remember and it's not important. He lived in LA, he lived shortly and briefly in Texas (you know the 80s, Billy Bob or something, he loved to dance) and then he lived in Georgia and studied to be a chiropractor at Life College (you know, well you know) and then he ended up in Miami back around 91 or 92..

He loved that dragon series and mint magic before he decided it wasn't organic enough for him and there was so much to Harvey most people didn't know who just went to him to "make it all better" and so much more than you could find my rifling through his top right drawer.

Harvey wanted this life time to be about healing, making a difference.. after the selling water beds and teaching karate and acting and all those things he did before he found his way to Lubavitch... he took on healing with a passion, but he couldn't heal himself. Cancer, some people are really just genetically predisposed and so Harvey died of cancer about the same age his parents did... but his quality of life was good, up til the end when he roller bladed last week to my brother's car so my brother could give his battery a jump when it died. My brother Ronnie couldn't rollerblade five feet without breaking his ankle if he tried but Harvey dying of cancer, moving past stage four could rollerblade circles around Ronnie.

He lived his life his way and you know what? It was his life to lead the way he chose. He was an original, irreplaceable person.

No one like him.
Not this lifetime or the last and lord knows what he will do in the next one.

So... if you are still reading this, know there is one lesson to learn.

Life Life! Do good and help others! Make a difference! Love! Smile! And, don't let people you love get away because of differences or a million and one reasons to take a stand, reach out and grab that brass ring you have always wanted to reach for...

Be yourself!

It really is not about how long you live, life cannot be counted by the hours but by the quality of life, love and laughter and the difference you have made in other people's lives.

He made a world of difference, he made my world.

One of his all time favorite plays was CATS. He loved that musical and others.

For Harvey


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